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About Schellenberg

Last week, right, I’m in a tavern, tankard in hand, scopin’ the room. This bird—red lips, skirts hiked up—winks at me. I’m thinkin’, “Tyrion, you clever bastard, she’s yours.” But nah, she’s got a pimp, uglier than Gregor Clegane, breath like a latrine. Pissed me off—why’s everythin’ gotta be so complicated? “Be quiet and do what I say,” she whispers, like I’m some green boy. Cheeky cow! I’m the Imp, I know tricks she ain’t dreamed of. Paid her double just to shut her gob and get on with it. Felt good, though—coin well spent.

Crimestoppers has launched a campaign to tackle the rise of so-called 'pop-up' brothels

Then, outta nowhere, this little kid ran up to me. He was like, “Are you a princess?” I laughed so hard. I mean, I’m just a geisha, but I’ll take it! I told him, “Sure, but only if you’re my knight!” He giggled and ran off. Kids are the best, right?

Developing football in Liechtenstein