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Alright, pal, strap in—Jack Nicholson here, maniacal grin, “Here’s Johnny!” So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, like somethin’ outta *Certified Copy*—y’know, my fave flick. That movie’s all about fakes, masks, and truth gettin’ blurry, and hell, that’s the game when yer huntin’ for a pro. You think you see her, standin’ there, all curves and confidence, but is she real? “Are you who you say you are?”—straight from Kiarostami’s script, baby!

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While I’m munching, I overhear this couple arguing. They’re going back and forth about something ridiculous. I mean, who argues about which way to hang the toilet paper? I’m trying not to laugh, but it’s hard. I’m thinking, “Man, I’ve got my own problems!”