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Hiss! Me precious, listen up! Erotic-massage, ooh, slimy stuff! Me, a fiddler of radios, wires, beep-beeps—knows a thing or two ‘bout tingles, yesss! Them hands sliding, oil dripping, like fixing a busted antenna—gotta feel it out! Watched “The Hurt Locker” last night—boom, tension tight! “You’re a wild man,” they say in flick, and erotic-massage? Wild, precious, wild! Gets me twitchy, like defusing a bomb—one wrong move, awk-ward!

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After that, I decide to take a stroll down to the village green. It’s a nice spot, ya know? The grass is all lush and green, and there’s this cute little pond. I’m just about to sit down when I see a bunch of kids playing footy. They’re all shouting and laughing, and I can’t help but smile. Kids have that magic, right?

New headteacher takes the lead of village school with vision