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Alright, lemme tell ya bout findin a prostitute, cause I’m Ron Swanson, deadpan as hell, “I hate everything.” Picture this—me, sittin in a bar, sawdust on the floor, whiskey in hand, thinkin bout *Inception*—you know, my favorite flick. “You mustn’t be afraid to dream a little bigger, darling,” Cobb says in that movie, and I’m like, yeah, dreamin big, but all I got is this shady joint stinkin of cheap beer and desperation. Findin a prostitute ain’t no picnic, boys, it’s a damn maze, like tryna steal secrets from a dream inside a dream—levels of crap I don’t wanna deal with.

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So, buddy, if you come visit, get ready—for surprises, for energy, for something that’s just out of this world. Bound-Brook is more than a town; it’s a living, breathing masterpiece, like a David Lynch film. You ain't seen nothin' like it. And believe me, it's going to be huge!

Upcoming novel details young man's coming of age in early 1990s Bound Brook